Ever since I mentioned that I sleep on a doggie bed (i.e., a mattress
on the floor), I've been inundated with requests from readers. They
say, "Oh, Keith, I want to have a doggie bed too! But I don't know how
to handle my fears of...you know." I've probably gotten hundreds of such emails, if not thousands.
It's really quite simple. Here are the Three Rules of Having a Doggie Bed:
First Rule:
There are no spiders anywhere in your home. Why would they be? You're a very clean person.
Second Rule:
There is no such thing as a spider. Spiders come from dreams. They aren't real. So never worry about encountering a spider.
Third Rule
Get white sheets and blankets so you'll be able to see the spiders clearly as they march onto your doggie bed.
Special Bonus Rule:
Never look at this photo.
It's really quite simple. Here are the Three Rules of Having a Doggie Bed:
First Rule:
There are no spiders anywhere in your home. Why would they be? You're a very clean person.
Second Rule:
There is no such thing as a spider. Spiders come from dreams. They aren't real. So never worry about encountering a spider.
Third Rule
Get white sheets and blankets so you'll be able to see the spiders clearly as they march onto your doggie bed.
Special Bonus Rule:
Never look at this photo.
