Baseball pops up again

The long, cold winter is over and baseball is here. I can't tell you how thrilling this is for me. I adore baseball. When baseball is in season, I don't have to have a life -- which is such a relief. I can just sit in front of the TV and watch games. What a benefit!

Even though the season is young, I've already heard odd things from the sportscasters. Now you get to hear about them too.

Let's start with things that confused me.

I asked this last year and got no answer. I'm still waiting, so here it is again: What the hell is a "seeing-eye single"? I heard it again this year and I have no clue what it means.

Keith Hernandez said something that went right over my head. He said, "But if you get a hammy or a calf injury, that's trouble up river city". River city?

Another one that confused me, at least at first, was that after a guy hit a line drive into left field, Keith (why is it always Keith?) said "You could hang laundry on that long drive. Look at that clothesline!" I thought about this and was initially stumped. In the end, I decided that he was talking about the height of the drive. It was literally at clothesline level. You wouldn't think something like that would become a thing.

And finally (in the "I didn't understand it" category), I've been stumped by something that I never heard before. The announcers keep talking about who won a platinum glove last year. Platinum? I seem to have missed a memo.

Here's a fun, odd thing: I think it was Gary Cohen (a Mets announcer) who told a story that involves the way New Yorkers speak. He said a long time ago, a Brooklyn Dodgers pitcher named Hoyt was hit by a ball. In response, the fans yelled "Hoyt's hurt!" But in typical New York accents, it came out "Hurts hoyt".

UPDATE: It occurs to me that this might not be clear to those outside NY. In the old days, New Yorkers said "erl" for "oil". And yes, they said "oil" for "earl". They were very consistent about their mispronunciations. So Hoyt's hurt came out Hurt's hoyt. See? This is about men my father's age (he's dead now; we're talking long ago). They spoke in a weird neighborhood way. I was amused when they would try to say "iodine". It came out "ee-oh-deen". As I say, they were consistent. I wonder how all that began. End of Update.

Baseball's back and I'm lovin' it. Hopefully you've got something in your life that provides this much fun for you. Okay, I'm gonna go watch another game. Later.