2013 World Baseball Classic -- and language

Okay, so there's a global baseball championship going on. It's called the 2013 World Baseball Classic (a dumb name, with the "classic" moniker, which makes you think it's a repeat). There are games every night. Mexico, Puerto Rico, Italy, US, Venezuela, the Dominican Republic, Australia and more -- all the countries with baseball teams are included.

But it makes no sense. The "Italian" team is made up of Italian nationals and a whole bunch of American players. Same for all the other "national" teams. Apparently, the competition is being run like religion, where you simply drift to your preferred affiliation. Feel Catholic? You're Catholic. Same here. The players go to whatever team they feel aligned with.

How does that make any sense? Last night, Italy played the U.S. and I found myself rooting for Italy because it had more American players that I really like. Go Italy! And if some country wins, what would it mean? It's a U.S. win, no matter the country name. If this is a global competition, then let each country mount their own team. If you don't do this, the competition is a joke.

Okay, now to language. One of the broadcasters kept using a phrase I haven't heard in years. He'd say stuff like, "He didn't know he'd be playing with the likes of Carlos Beltran tonight!" He did this over and over, talking about the likes of this player and that player. I hadn't heard the phrase in ages, so it really struck me.

What I realized is that this phrase is always a value judgement. Looking around the net, I bumped into many uses of the phrase, For instance, "Oh, Shakespeare is much too intellectual for the likes of me." In this case, it's a put-down. And yet you'll also hear, when a revered politician dies, "We'll not see the likes of him again in our lifetime." I never noticed this. The phrase is all about judgemental attitudes. Just thought I'd point this out.

PS: The "classic" is decimating spring training. The spring training games were great and I was enjoying the hell out of them -- and suddenly they were preempted by these meaningless exhibitions. Sigh. Baseball is run by idiots. But then, that's nothing new.

Minutes from now, heaven will open up

It's the first day of baseball spring training and I'm so excited, I could scream. In (looks at clock) ten minutes, the sound of baseball will wash over me. I cannot wait. Mets v. Nats. I couldn't ask for more.

Jesus skips camp; shows up for season

During baseball's spring training, I noticed that the players did not make the sign of the cross before taking a swing. And the pitchers never knelt in ceremonial, look-at-me-I'm-holy prayer before taking the mound. It was refreshing to see that Jesus wasn't invited to camp.

But on Opening Day, Jesus charged out onto the field with our boys. Hooray! Now the lads don't have to suffer outside the sight of their Lord. They are again in his Grace. We know because the stupid twits never miss an opportunity to flash that magic hand across their head, shoulders and heart. Jeebus rides with them once again! I can't wait to see my first pitcher kneeling so everyone can check out how pious he is.

So yes, Jeebus is back. But let us remember for all time that He is not welcome at spring training. I get more fond of spring training with each passing year. It's a good, clean time.

PS: I was going to include a photo of players or teams praying but was utterly horrified by the sheer glut of such pictures I found with a simple search. Ugh. There is no god, people. And players shouldn't bring their absurd religious fantasies into the national game of baseball. They soil the game (and their religion too, by the way; but that's another post for a different blog).

It's here!

I can't believe there's a Spring training game this Saturday between the Mets and the Braves! (1:10 PM on PIX and again at 7 on SNY, for local readers.) This is so cool. A real, actual game (that doesn't count)! I am so ready.

The sound of the first game will wash over me and cleanse my nonexistent soul. It always does. It's one of the truly magical experiences in my life. And it's free. 

As I've said before, I love Spring training because you get to see the new guys they might call up during the season. I find that pre-season experience enhances my fan experience tremendously. They're old friends by the time they come up. I can't wait.