Benedict portrait made from condoms

You can see the image here. Niki Johnson, the artist, calls the image "Eggs Benedict". It's a portrait of the popeyguy emeritus, made out of colorful condoms. She created it in response to Benedict's horrifying words when he visited Africa:

“I would say that this problem of AIDS cannot be overcome merely with money, necessary though it is,” Benedict remarked. “If there is no human dimension, if Africans do not help, the problem cannot be overcome by the distribution of prophylactics: on the contrary, they increase it.”

He actually suggested that condoms increase AIDS. That's our former popeyguy for you. Given his behavior, this is a fitting tribute.

The changing of the guard

Shortly before 5 p.m. Thursday, Benedict will leave the palace for the last time as pontiff, head to the helipad at the top of the hill in the Vatican gardens and fly to the papal retreat at Castel Gandolfo south of Rome. 

There, at 8 p.m. sharp, Benedict will become the first pontiff in 600 years to resign. The Swiss Guards standing at attention will go into the palazzo and shut the doors behind them and go off duty, their service protecting the head of the Catholic Church over — for now.

Lombardi said the guards would change into civilian clothes and return to the Vatican barracks Thursday night. 

As I understand it, the guards will change their clothes and take a steam bath in front of the popey guy, as a sort of friendly, masculine send-off. Then, filled with memories of the men's bodies, Benedict will get the papal goosebumps one last time -- and enter his apartment alone. And with that, the popey guy will be no more.

It just tears your heart out, doesn't it?

At first?!

A NY Times article about the pope recounts his early papacy:

At first, he was stiff.

Giovanni Maria Vian, the editor of the pope's newspaper L'Osservatore Romano, recalled that in the early days Benedict used to greet crowds with an awkward victory gesture "as if he were an athlete." 

"At some point someone told him that wasn't a very papal gesture," Vian said. Benedict changed course, opting instead for an open-armed embrace or an almost effeminate twinkling of his fingers on an outstretched hand as a way of connecting with the crowd. 

And with this move, I guess he wasn't stiff anymore. Hey, I didn't write it; the Times did.

I'm sure gay families will be welcome

PHILADELPHIA (AP) — Philadelphia will host a large gathering of the Roman Catholic church called the World Meeting of Families in September 2015, an event expected to bring hundreds of thousands from around the world, church officials announced Monday. 

I'm sure they'll make every effort to include gay families. Right? Right? Of course not. The pope could hardly restrain himself when talking about these gatherings last year. "Family", to the pope, means "kill the gays".

I hope if there are any gay families that (foolishly) think of themselves as Roman Catholic, they'll head on over with their kids and several gay flags and lots of gay friends with video cameras to record the reactions of the loving Christians.

City of brotherly love, my ass. This is going to be a hate fest.

It seems I control the news

I watched ABC news last night and was overjoyed to see them trash the pope, the Vatican and the cardinals. It almost seemed like I'd written the script. The segment was both accurate and snarky. It ended by saying that Cardinal Mahony, who hid LA's rapist priests, had compared his well-deserved humiliation to the pain suffered by Jesus.

It was great fun. But of course, these newsfolk have no mettle and even less memory. They'll soon be kneeling reverently as they watch white smoke curl into the sky. But you can't deny the majesty of this moment in time, when all the world can see the evil Vatican for what it is -- a group of old men who care about no one but themselves.

What the next pope will face

There's a story at the NYT today about Vatican intrigue. The upshot is that it won't be smooth sailing for the next pope. The story begins by recounting the theft of the pope's papers by his butler.

And if that original sin weren't enough, the content of the leaks confirmed that the next pope has a very messy house to clean up. The letters and memos exposed petty wrangling, corruption and cronyism at the highest levels of the Catholic Church. The dirt ranged from the awarding of Vatican contracts to a plot, purportedly orchestrated by senior Vatican officials, to out a prominent Catholic newspaper editor as gay.

Always thinking sweet thoughts, these princes of the church. What I want to know about is the "homosexual liaisons" at the Vatican. The butler pointed to this, but no one ever followed it up. Gee, I wonder why.

I think my favorite line is this:

And as cardinal, after priestly sex abuse cases bounced for years among Vatican offices, the former Joseph Ratzinger took them over himself in 2001. 

Yes, we've heard it before but it can't be stated too often. It's the information that won't go away: Ratzinger was in charge of the entire pedophilia scandal. The popey guy! Catholics are great at ignoring this but their lack of attention doesn't erase the issue. The whole world knows that the pope was in charge of sexual abuse cases since 2001. Most of the children who were abused after that date owe their pain and horror to one man: Pope Benedict. (Okay, the priest who attacked them is also responsible. Still, that's quite a pope they've got there.)

Exorcists pleased with Ratzinger

From HuffPo's ridiculous religion page:

"Benedict held an audience with exorcists from all over the world and welcomed us with words of great, great encouragement," Gabriel Amorth, devil fighter for the diocese of Rome for 27 years, said late Friday in an interview with Italian religious channel TV2000.

"He has continued to encourage us. The pope has done a lot to revise procedures... and given us powerful prayers that serve to exorcise," said Amorth.

Powerful prayers, eh? I'd like to hear these powerful prayers, wouldn't you? It's a wonder that certain words are more effective against the devil, and that it took over 2,000 years to locate these words. I wonder if the phrase "intrinsically disordered" made its way into the prayers.

He [Amorth] said that cases of full possession by the devil are very rare, but that he has seen victims "walk on walls, slither across the floor like a snake."

Disturbances caused by the devil, however, "have become extremely common."

And what are these disturbances, pray tell? He doesn't say. I wonder if "angry New Atheists" are among the unspecified disturbances.

The Association of Exorcists also has its work cut out because "the act of exorcism had been suspended for centuries, and while there is a huge request for exorcists, there are priests and bishops who do not believe in it."

Imagine that. Some priests are sensible.

Why the pope quit

If this is true, the pope quit his job to escape justice. Wouldn't surprise me.

Pope Benedict, Joseph Ratzinger, has scheduled a meeting with Italian President Giorgio Napolitano for Saturday, February 23 to discuss securing protection and immunity from prosecution from the Italian government, according to Italian media sources.

Ratzinger’s meeting follows upon the apparent receipt by the Vatican of a diplomatic note from an undisclosed European government on February 4, stating its intention to issue an arrest warrant for Ratzinger, who resigned from his pontificate less than a week later.

Ratzinger orchestrated the hiding of rapist priests, thus sheltering them from justice. He is the person most responsible for the pedophilia scandal. The man belongs in prison. What a fitting end that would be for this pope.

On the other hand, I found this on Ed Brayton's blog and he suggests we take this news with a grain of salt. He thinks it might be one of those citizen's-arrest type things. But we can still hope it's real.

When a pope dies

When a pope dies, he is effectively out of the way. This itself -- the death -- allows for the possibility of change.

But when a Pope steps down, he's still able to glare at the cardinals who will choose his successor. He still holds them in thrall. In such an environment, nothing can change. Even if the pope is not in the room when the cardinals make their choice -- they will have to face him afterward.

I'm sure the pope understands this completely. It's the reason he resigned: so he can be there to manipulate the process of choosing the next pope. If he died "in office", he'd lose that control -- and this cagey pope is all about control. Above all, he wants to know that his "legacy" of hatred will continue into the next papacy.

What an awful creature he is.

Popey guy can't say "celibacy"

The popey guy is spreading cheer in Ireland this weekend.

VATICAN CITY (AP) — Pope Benedict XVI has told Irish Catholics it's a mystery why clergy abused children entrusted in their care and undermined believers' faith in an appalling way. 

Benedict said Irish joy over their long history of faith was "shaken in an appalling way" by revelations of clergy abuse. He said the abuse damaged the credibility of the church's message. He added it "remains" a mystery why priests abused this trust. 

I can't imagine why it happened, can you? You don't think it could have anything to do with the vow of celibacy, do you?! No, I thought not.

I'll bet the popey guy has a regular nightmare about celibacy. In the dream, he lets priests marry -- and 90% marry men.