Missing phrase

Talking about ourselves -- whether in a personal conversation or through social media sites like Facebook and Twitter -- triggers the same sensation of pleasure in the brain as food or money, researchers reported.

Missing phrase: "if you're a self-important twit".

Remember when the US Supreme Court used to inspire respect?

AP -- Bucking the Obama administration, Supreme Court justices seemed to find little trouble Wednesday with major parts of Arizona's tough immigration law that require police to check the legal status of people they stop for other reasons.

Five Easy Pieces at the DMV

The last time I visited the DMV to renew my license, they took a few photos. Then the 50ish female clerk put four photos on the screen and said, "Pick one."

I said "I don't care. You pick one."

Instantly, the woman became apoplectic. "You have to pick one of the photos," she said, as if explaining to a child that night will come whether the child likes it or not.

I can't help myself -- I love to kick the supports out from under this sort of rigid fool.

I said, "I really don't care. Any one will do. Any one at all."

Her face darkened. She said, "You have to choose one of these photos. Pick one."

Then her face turned an even deeper red and she compressed her lights so tightly that I thought she might hurt herself. She stared -- and the look in those eyes! The woman apparently thought she was looking at the devil hisself, a creature that wouldn't follow rules! Lawdy!

"I don't care which one you use, " I said again. "You'll have to choose." And I smiled, very sweetly I thought.

After a long hesitation during which she glared at me incessantly, her eyes telling me everything her mouth never would, the woman finally stabbed a key. It was clear that she'd rather stick a spike in my eye. Sweet lady. She chose a nice photo, too. Thanks, DMV lady!

You know, next time I take a driving photo I think I'll toss my ponytail around to the front. It's more obnoxious that way.

Religion is selfish

Religious people are so selfish that they are ghastly to look upon. They are abominations.

Think about it. It's all about them and their "salvation", isn't it? Nothing else in the universe matters except that they persist like the most virulent virus, all the way into eternity. Consider how repulsively self-important this endeavor is.

And all the people who don't believe in their little cult? They can go to hell, literally. So the religious not only get to go to heaven, they also get the thrill of knowing that everyone else will burn in agony for all eternity. Kids, too! Anyone can be thrown into hell. It's an equal opportunity kind of place. So it's a win-win thing for the religious -- splendor for them; suffering for eternity for everyone else. Oh, and their god is "love". Sweet, huh?

No, it isn't. It's sickening. These religious fools think the entire universe -- and the multiverse, should it exist -- revolves around them. Nothing matters except that they snag the grand prize. Reality is just a big mirror for these folks -- there's nothing but them and their goddamned salvation.

And when they finally do claw their way into heaven, they will live forever, alongside other, brain-dead beings just like them, folks who followed the same, pinhead path and never allowed one new idea to enter their brains. And for this selfish, dimwitted philosophy, they demand our respect -- and eternity.

Religious people are disgusting.