Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Dear rightwing lunatics

We bloggers are a powerful lot. With our words, we can do anything. We could even pause the rotation of the Earth for a moment, if we wished. Oh, yes. This is within our power. But we're not a showy lot. Lowkey -- that's us.

In fact, we have the power to stop the beating of every rightwing heart, all over the Earth, all at the same instant. All we have to do is say the words of the Special Incantation. The Incantation is very well known in the blogging world. It's bandied about at conferences all the time, emailed and pasted all over the place. We all know the words of the Special Incantation.

Like nuclear power, the Incantation holds us in thrall. We don't want to be the one to set it off because the results are so far-reaching, and the Incantation cannot be recalled. Once it's loose, it's all over in a flash.

So, rightwing lunatics, consider yourselves on trial. We haven't done it yet; don't make us. If I was you, I'd be very good for the next few months and years (and decades). One false move, and surely some blogger somewhere will whip out the Special Incantation -- and recite the sacred words.

Don't make us do it. Just don't.