Mexico's religious crazies

Mexican religious loons don't want public education for their kids because that would cause them to encounter, you know, ideas. Can't have that.

According to traditionalists, the government-mandated uniforms, school books and lesson plans, not to mention the computers and televisions now used in many Mexican classrooms, would violate the Virgin Mary's orders, on her own sacred ground.

The faith of the people here is built on messages purportedly passed from the Virgin Mary to a defrocked Catholic priest, an illiterate old woman and a clairvoyant.

Same song, different key and country. Religion poisons minds all over the globe.

Creationist lunacy

Both PZ and Jerry Coyne focused on one particular intelligent-design fool's remarks today. I want to excerpt something the creationist idiot said. Here's the quote:

Is the process of eating and cellular respiration the result of a mere fluke of evolution? Alternatively, could it be that a common Designer made certain that the process of eating and cellular respiration would function in such a precise and perfect manner? Which answer appears to be the most probable to you?

Yes, indeed. Jeebus sure did make everything convenient for us, didn't he? I mean, if you think about it, he's the one who's responsible for ensuring that children who are buried under an earthquake -- but still alive -- have the awareness to know that rats are eating them as they die. And come to think of it, it must be this Jeebus fellow who made pain so painful. Wow, he was really watching out for us with that one, huh? Thankfully, because of Jeebus' "precise and perfect" ministrations, many people live in intense, unbearable and constant pain throughout their lives. Jeebus must be one swell guy. 

I swear, these creationists haven't got a single brain cell in their heads. They can't think clearly about anything.

The GOP candidates

I don't understand why any attention is paid to the Republican primaries. What is there to say after you've taken one glance at these lying stooges? Nothing.

They've got a Ken doll running against a Mr. Rogers doll, and there's a nasty Troll doll in the background. And yet the media devotes endless hours of TV time to these clowns every damn day. Nothing could be more boring or meaningless.

If the media ever decided to get real again and report truthfully on things that matter to our country, all the stupidity would go poof in an instant. The kind of brainless banter that passes for American dialogue these days can only exist in an information vacuum.

But the media provides this very thing. As long as they fail to say this is true and that isn't, nothing will change. Without real investigative journalism and a firm commitment to truth, rationality and logic, the country will go down the tubes.

This accounts for the flushing sound you hear.

You know who makes me mad?

Ron Fouchier, that's who. Each time I bump into a story about what he's done, I'm newly furious. If you read between the lines in the linked article, it tells us that there's a decent chance that over 50% of the world's population will be dead in ten years -- directly because of this guy's work.

In case you're not aware the story, Fouchier took bird flu (H5N1), one of the most dangerous flu viruses ever known -- but one that doesn't spread readily -- and made it airborne, thus creating the greatest viral danger humans have ever faced. H5N1 is nasty but it rarely spreads beyond the infected individual. However, now that Fouchier has given the virus wings, it can travel around the world with ease and infect virtually everyone it comes in contact with. We have absolutely no immunity to this thing.

Let us adore the virgin Mary's sacred belt

Maybe you're having a difficult day, burdened by all the things you have to do for Thanksgiving -- cooking, traveling, dealing with dreadful relatives, etc. Some of you are probably feeling overwhelmed about now. Well, take heart -- at least you aren't doing something colossally stupid and meaningless today, like these people are:

MOSCOW (AP) — Braving freezing cold temperatures and ice-covered sidewalks, tens of thousands of Russians stood in line Wednesday to see and kiss a newly arrived relic of the Virgin Mary in Russia's largest Orthodox cathedral.

It gets worse:

The Virgin Mary's Cincture, a belt that Christians believe was worn by Jesus' mother, was brought to Russia last month from Mount Athos, a monastic community in Greece.

Kissing the relic, which is encased in an ornamental box, is believed to help barren women conceive and heal other ailments.

The line of people, mostly women, waiting to enter the golden-domed Christ the Savior Cathedral stretched for 2.5 miles (4 kilometers) along the Moscow River despite temperatures that dropped to below minus 5 Celsius (23 Fahrenheit).

Police officers announced through bullhorns that it will take worshippers 24 hours to get to the relic as the line swelled to tens of thousands.

So be happy today. At least you're not an imbecile waiting in the cold for 24 hours to kiss a goddamn belt that somebody probably made a couple of years ago. Happy Thanksgiving everyone, and remember -- the thing to be most thankful for is that you're not burdened by mindless religious beliefs. Woot!

Don't forget: world ends today, 6 PM sharp.

From one of the dolts who believes he will be raptured today:

"We know the end will begin in New Zealand and will follow the sun and roll on from there," said Garcia, a 39-year-old father of six. "That's why God raised up all the technology and the satellites so everyone can see it happen at the same time."

I cannot imagine what it will be like for these gullible fools when the world doesn't end at 6 PM today. And to think they're following the predictions of a guy who's already been colossally wrong about this sort of thing once before! He ruined countless lives back then and is repeating his act today. Talk about an evil man.

Meanwhile, back in the real world:

A landslide buried 20 children and four adults at a Malaysian orphanage Saturday where scores of rescuers were digging by their hands in soil softened by the rains to find the missing, police said.

If today really was the rapture, I wouldn't mind if it meant I could stand before god and slap him across his face as hard as I could and claw his eyes out for creating a world with so much pain for so many innocent creatures. It might be worth the end of the world if I could do that.

But the world won't end today so I guess I'll just watch baseball tonight (you know, when the earthquakes are supposed to start rolling in). Go Mets!

Portrait of fools

It's hard to believe that some folks think the world will end this Saturday. Imagine being the normal kids of weird parents who have fallen for this inane proposition.

Read this story at the Times. You'll shake your head. What will this family's life be like after the "rapture"? I shudder to think.

Breathtaking stupidity from Timmy Dolan

From an article in the Orlando Sentinel. Hat tip to Joe.My.God.

Catholic Archbishop Timothy Dolan — “America’s Pope” — appeared Sunday on 60 Minutes Overtime to discuss some of the most critical issues facing the church, including gay marriage, celibacy for priests, and the ordination of women.

On his opposition to gay marriage, Dolan said, “I have a strong desire to play shortstop for the Yankees. But I don’t have a right to because I don’t have what it takes. And that’s what the Church would say about marriage.”

Truly breathtaking stupidity. What an appalling sense of privilege exists inside this disgusting man. He is a stinking pile of hatred -- and always wears a beguiling smile as he harms his latest target. We can only hope that Dolan becomes the next popey guy because an evil person like this, wearing all the festive popey hats and outfits, will cause a swift and calamitous collapse in what remains of the reputation of the roman catholic church. Go Timmy!

Trashing Ash Wednesday

I was going to write something vicious, but why bother? PZ has it covered. I won't ruin the fun by telling you what he said but if smudges on foreheads are ticking you off today, by all means, visit the link.

Religion is selfish

Religious people are so selfish that they are ghastly to look upon. They are abominations.

Think about it. It's all about them and their "salvation", isn't it? Nothing else in the universe matters except that they persist like the most virulent virus, all the way into eternity. Consider how repulsively self-important this endeavor is.

And all the people who don't believe in their little cult? They can go to hell, literally. So the religious not only get to go to heaven, they also get the thrill of knowing that everyone else will burn in agony for all eternity. Kids, too! Anyone can be thrown into hell. It's an equal opportunity kind of place. So it's a win-win thing for the religious -- splendor for them; suffering for eternity for everyone else. Oh, and their god is "love". Sweet, huh?

No, it isn't. It's sickening. These religious fools think the entire universe -- and the multiverse, should it exist -- revolves around them. Nothing matters except that they snag the grand prize. Reality is just a big mirror for these folks -- there's nothing but them and their goddamned salvation.

And when they finally do claw their way into heaven, they will live forever, alongside other, brain-dead beings just like them, folks who followed the same, pinhead path and never allowed one new idea to enter their brains. And for this selfish, dimwitted philosophy, they demand our respect -- and eternity.

Religious people are disgusting.

Wingnuts today

Here's what the wingnuts are thinking about are repeating today. This is from Worldnutdaily:

A mysterious, pale green figure seen in televised news coverage of the Egyptian riots has prompted some viewers to ask, "Could this be the Fourth Horseman of the Apocalypse?"

The footage, provided by Euronews and subsequently seen on MSNBC, CNN and uploaded over a dozen times to the popular video sharing site YouTube, captures the fiery, violent protests in Cairo this past week … and something else.

Between the crowds of protesters and barricades, the video shows a flowing, pale green image that resembles an erect rider atop a horse in Medieval-like barding. The ethereal figure remains for a few moments before floating over protesters' heads and off the screen.

The last of the biblical Book of Revelation's Four Horseman of the Apocalyse, the "pale rider" is said to be the bringer of death and the forerunner of "hell" on earth.

Are all these events the natural order of things, or warnings of the end times described in the Bible? This DVD probes the answer ...

Oh, I see. The wingnuts are selling something. Surprise, surprise. And rubes all over the country will get their panties in a bunch over this. It's wingnuts gone wild. You almost find yourself pitying these people. Just kidding. What a bunch of jerks!

What the hell, it's Sunday

I think we have to face something: You're nobody until you've been picketed by the idiots from the Westboro Baptist Church. When they go after you, it's sort of like getting the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval used to be.

So what do you have to do, who do you have to be, for the Westboro dingbats to target you? Judging by their actions, the answer is a soldier, a grieving relative, an upstanding Democrat, a gay person, a liberal or an atheist -- in other words, a decent person with a brain that works. That's all it takes for these evil demons to target you.

It's the new imprimatur: being picketed by the craziest goons ever to live in this country. And, hooo-eee! That comes with a whole passel o' meaning. I can only say that I hope they picket me one day. Then I'll know I've really arrived.

The TSA and religious folks

I got a big kick last week out of official hate-group spokesman Peter La Barbera (Americans for Truth) saying, "Is it fair to travelers who may end up getting 'groped' by homosexual TSA agents who are secretly getting turned on through the process?"

Yeah, that's just what's happening, petey. I'll bet gay guys are clamoring for those jobs. Sorry hon, but you don't know jack about gay men (or rather that's all you know about us). See, we get to touch guys' junk all the time. It's not a rarity in our lives.

If we want to have sex, we have sex. It's easy to find another guy to fool around with. So no, petey, it doesn't sound to us like it would be fun to touch random men at an airport. Have you ever looked at random men? Oh, I forgot, you're too busy watching us. Petey, you are far too interested in us, and everyone but you realizes this. I think you'd rather cop a feel than write about us but you're just too scared. Petey, here's the thing: only closet cases are as vicious as you. If you don't believe me, check out the pope: same story.

I think the only workers having trouble on the TSA line are delicate, bigoted, rightwing religious folks like you who are so sexually deprived that they're nearly insane. They have avoided men's bodies all their lives. They've probably never even gone to a gym or served in the army, so they've never seen a naked man. And now they have to touch their . . . parts!

So I'll bet lots of these allegedly straight TSA bigots are finding it hard to go to sleep at night, what with groping men for a living, and all. It probably stirs up their deepest sexual urges. Men! I imagine them trying to cast the devil (their thoughts of those nasty, vile penises) out of bed at night -- fruitlessly, of course. Yup, I think a lot of religious, male TSA bigots are quite excited by the new patdown procedures. We may see some severe crack-ups in this group if they have to continue groping guys all day long, penis after penis after penis.

In the meantime, you just keep on railing, petey, so you'll always be the biggest fool around no matter where you go. By the way, have you patted any guys down at the airport yourself, to, you know, see if your junk tingles? Go ahead, petey! And then tell us how it didn't affect you. Har har.

PS: I see we can add Eugene Delgaudio, an elected official on the Loudoun County Board of Supervisors in Virginia, to the list of similar men. He recently said: "the next TSA official that gives you an 'enhanced pat down' could be a practicing homosexual secretly getting pleasure from your submission." Having trouble sleeping at night, Eugene? Just askin'.

The GOP and the roman catholic church

This morning, Joe.My.God pointed readers to an article on the ISSA site. That's the atheist-freethinker group at the University of Illinois. They report the idiotic words of some fool who's a cardinal in the catholic church. The dolt's name is Pell. He said:

"A minority of people, usually people without religion, are frightened by the future.....It's almost as though they've … nothing but fear to distract themselves from the fact that without God the universe has no objective purpose or meaning. Nothing beyond the constructs they confect to cover the abyss...life without purpose, without constraints."

It's a riot, I know. Here's someone who shops lies to children for a living, and he's talking about a life without purpose. But the thing that hit me as I read this is that the roman catholic church is doing exactly the same thing the GOP is doing right now: jumping off Bridge Sanity into the dung-filled ocean of rightwing nonsense -- and leaving their core constituents in the dust.

That's my point. The vast majority of Americans realize, I think, that the GOP has become an odious monster. Most Americans don't like rightwing lunatics. While many are fooled by the inaccurate reporting foisted on them by just about every media outlet, GOPers with sound minds are horrified that the GOP has slipped into full-bore insanity. This is not what they hoped for.

I think the roman catholic church is making the exact same mistake. It thinks its flock will happily jump into the abyss with it. They won't. Most catholics are pretty normal, from what I've seen, and they are secretly or not-so-secretly disgusted that their church, an organization they had hoped to trust all their lives, has turned into an overflowing toilet.

The Catholic Conference of Bishops has been euding pus for a long time (and will squeeze out a lot more now that odious NY archbishop timothy dolan heads it). This group actually hands out anti-gay DVDs to the dioceses (that is so hard for me to believe!) and takes every backward position it possibly can. It's like they've decided to piss on humanity -- and they're letting loose a major stream right now.

But both the GOP and the roman catholic church are making a huge error. Most of their members are not insane, craven, hating machines -- and they will turn on their masters. Soon, I hope.

The time we are living through right now is a period of mental illness that will pass. And in the wake of the illness, as it ebbs away like a bad headache and we remember who we are, the warlords in charge of both the church and the GOP will be remembered by their constituents as disgusting and perverted creatures who tried to push a new Dark Age upon humanity.

I do love dear cardinal Pell's statement that atheists are "frightened of the future." Uh, just sayin', but aren't the people who look at the facts with open eyes and update their view of the world in order to accommodate reality actually the ones who aren't afraid?  And on the other hand, aren't the people who hide in a 2,000-year-old book without meaning, who duck and parry each time reality knocks on their door, the deluded ones?

We atheists see purpose in our lives, even if the universe has no meaning. That's what they don't get. Humans apply themselves to their lives and seek and find meaning in real things --  you know, the stuff that actually exists out there. And you know what? Our purpose includes whacking religion at every opportunity.

So keep saying stupid things, Pell (BTW, he also agrees with the pope that condoms don't slow the spread of AIDS; in the article, he says condoms make AIDS "worse" in Africa!) and we'll keep laughing at you. Is it a deal?

But watch your membership rolls, fellas. They're dropping, as I'm sure you've noticed. Why do you think that is, cardinal guy? Could it be that you're a monster who's scaring folks away? Just sayin'.

It speaks

So the pope appeared in the news today. In a back-and-forth about AIDS with a reporter he spouted complete nonsense, apparently thinking he'd said something with, you know, meaning. Here's the exchange:

Reporter: "Are you saying, then, that the Catholic Church is actually not opposed in principle to the use of condoms?"

The pope: "She of course does not regard it as a real or moral solution, but, in this or that case, there can be nonetheless, in the intention of reducing the risk of infection, a first step in a movement toward a different way, a more humane way, of living sexuality."

Nice. Very clear, pope guy. You sure straightened everything out with that comment. Now we understand . . . uh, duh . . . no, we don't. In fact, your response means nothing at all.

I love this part: ". . . in a movement toward a different way, a more humane way, of living sexuality." What in blazes does that mean? And you're the sexuality expert, eh? Well, you did have to delve into the field, what with all your priests having sex with innocent children and all.

So, pope guy, are you going to revisit South Africa now to tell the people there to use condoms, after you just told them not to? Maybe you can engrave those new, immortal words of yours on stones and drop them on the people from a plane. You know, to get that clear, new message out. Hallelujah!

He just goes around doing good works, doesn't he? Watta guy!

UPDATE: Here's a new quote from the AP about the popey guy's remarks:  "Pope Benedict XVI says in a new book that condoms can be justified for male prostitutes seeking to stop the spread of HIV." Nice. "Normal" people can't use condoms but prostitutes can -- and it's male prostitutes he's talking about. What a twisted creature.