Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Good news on the election front

I'm glad Obama was re-elected. But only because he was the lesser of two evils. The drone-killer incumbent beat the onrushing emperor of greed. Whoopee, sorta.

But of course the other election results were uplifting. Women, gays, pot and health were all winners. I'm very happy for Elizabeth Warren. Beating her male-model opponent was huge. Tammy Baldwin is another major win. And dog bless Claire McCaskill. I won't list all the uplifting wins. It's enough to say that the good guys won and the bad guys lost (with the exception of that damned idiot, Joe Arpaio, the sheriff of ugliness). Back to the good stuff: Gay marriage won a popular vote! First time ever. And hey, pot is legal in Washington state. That's going to help to turn the tide nationally. The time for viewing marijuana through a clouded rightwing lens is over.

And let's admit there's great joy when pondering some of the losses. Linda McMahon can suit up and hit the wrestling mats this morning. She's a free woman (with a lot less money). It's also gratifying to see Allen West lose his election. Sanity won out! And in a way, it's fun that Michelle Bachmann was re-elected. She's comedy gold and after all, it's only the House of Representatives. Everyone sees the House as a freak show these days. It's where she belongs.

I went to bed at 11 last night, figuring the results would still be there when I woke up. When I got up this morning, I reached for my iPad and asked Siri who won the election. She had no clue. She can tell me the score in the Giants game in a split second, but this question threw her. She asked me if I wanted her to look for an answer to that question on Google. I said no, I want you to answer it. She then asked if I wanted to look up "I want you to answer it" on the web. Oy.

But my computer revealed the truth and it was a sight to behold. As I say, Obama? Meh. But everything else was fabulous. Even the Macaca guy, George Allen, lost his election. There is a god. (Just kidding.) So how are the rest of you feeling about the election this morning? Are you watching Fox News to suck up the Schadenfreude? Mmmmmm. Smells good.

PS: And a huge middle finger to the Roman Catholic church, the greatest loser in this election. How'd all those illegal political entreaties from the pulpit go for ya? Not too good, huh? You and your evil minions, like NOM, look like cesspools this morning. How's that feel? Oh, and is the pope a little dyspeptic this morning? Good!