Sunday, March 24, 2013

He who barks

I got the call at midnight when I was dead asleep. Groggily, I said "OMD, who the hell is that?" When I reached for the phone, I heard my cousin Carmine's excited voice on the other end.

"It's dog! He was here!" he exclaimed. I could hear the tears of joy in his voice. Dog had come down to Earth and revealed himself -- to my cousin! I can't tell you much more because Carmine is sworn to secrecy. That's the way it works with these dogly visitations. It's like when you visit the Oracle. What she says is for your ears only. Similarly, he who barks, barks only for you.

But to prove that the one true dog appeared at my cousin's house, I present the photographic proof you see here. Luckily, when Carmine told his wife Barbara he had a hunch that dog was coming to their home, she said, "Jeebus! I'd better get a photo of this for Keith's blog!" Always thinking of me, that Barbara.

She grabbed her coat and camera and ran a few blocks away, figuring the shot needed perspective. And would you look at that photo! It's irrefutable proof that dog visited their house.

I tell you, something is in the air. Dog's visit -- and all those meteors and comets and popes! This may be the Time of Dogly Wisdom. In fact, I'll bet dog is going to appear to a number of my readers. I just feel it; no, that's not right. It's not merely a feeling -- it's a matter of faith. I have faith that dog will appear to us.

So, all of you -- keep an eye out. And sniff the air now and then to see if you can detect his dogly presence. (He smells like cookies.) And please report any and all visitations to this blog! I'm counting on you to be intrepid reporters in this Time of Dogly Wisdom.