Saturday, June 1, 2013

Catholics, Baptists and Boy Scouts, oh my!

There's an article at CNN about Baptist churches that are planning a mass "exodus" from the Boy Scouts of America, now that BSA has decided to treat gay kids fairly. Can't have that, no siree.

But the article also veers into other religions. Although the Catholic church seems to have no problem with the change (after all, they've got a ton of gay kids in their schools, and they only hate gay adults), some hateful Catholic priests do plan to join the exodus.
“I do not feel that it is possible for us to live out, and to teach, the authentic truth about human sexuality within the confines of the Boy Scout’s new policy,” said Lapp,  a pompous Catholic priest.
You really have to wonder how celibate priests got such a tight handle on the "authentic truth about human sexuality". But the biggest wingnut in the anti-gay Catholic Scouts movement is John Stemberger. The article wouldn't be complete without mentioning him.
John Stemberger, founder of On My Honor, a group that opposed the Scouts’ change in policy, plans to convene conservatives in Louisville, Kentucky, in June to consider forming a new Scout-like group, which could be up and running by the end of 2013.
I can just imagine the uniforms they'll design for these straights-only scout troops. I figure they'll have a big, golden cross on the front, and an American flag sewn into the back of the shirt. It reminds me of that famous quote by Sinclair Lewis:
"When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross."
Stemberger exemplifies this fascism perfectly. Perhaps he'll head the new organization and institute a Hitler salute for the scouts. Seriously, I cannot wait to see the uniforms for this newly minted Christian scouting organization. And hey, there may be major changes, too. Like maybe they'll camp out in churches -- you know, to avoid floods and predators. It'll be a whole new kind of scouting. Huzzah!

The article gives some hint of what these new scouting organizations might look like. Baptists already have an in-house organization for boys. It's called the Royal Ambassadors. A quote from one of their religious loons describes what it's like for the boys in the organization.
“We really have an opportunity here to strengthen our RA programs,” the Rev. Ernest Easley, chairman of the Southern Baptist Convention’s Executive Committee, said in a sermon last Sunday, “and to get the boys in a program where they’re going to be protected, where there’s a high moral standard and where they will have an opportunity to learn about camping, missions, evangelism in the local church.”
Sure sounds like fun, huh? You have to pity these kids.